Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother - featured in The Star

In the parenting section of The Star, the ever controversial book 'Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother' written by Amy Chua, is debated again.

The author did share views from western and Chinese parenting, her opinion on strict parenting style and high expectations on children.

The East meets West approach, the extreme in upbringing methods do create different preferences in the child. Parents play the most important role in shaping the child, and of course the innate type and talent, environment influece, cultural background do play their roles.

In my opinion, a blended approach, combining the east and west approach would be great. Western kids are more courageous and confident on speaking up and challenge ideas in constructive way. Chinese generally, due to Confucius teachings and some others are generally obedient and have high regards for the elderly.

Seldom we see the Chinese graciously accept compliments from others especially in my generation. The new generation at least are more receptive to compliments. When some other parents compliment the kid, more often than not the Chinese parent will deny the compliment and 'belittle' the kid in front of others. 'No, he is not smart. He is a lazy bum, always watching TV and play games'. Remarks like this is so common for the Chinese.

What is important is to strike a balance and give the child a conducive environment to grow up. Challenge the children's thinking skills and get them to generate options in making decisions.
It is never too early to engage the children in adults activities and events. Take time to explain to them when we do something or make a decision. Never belittle their maturity, especially now the kids have DHA in their milk, so their brain connectivity are even better than us, since we adults do not have this in our milk in old times.

Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device via Vodafone-Celcom Mobile.

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